Welcome to the Jungle
by The Mad One Mad Max
Summary: Three young wrestling fans earn the opportunity to compete in the WWE. And when I say "young," I mean like 14. Unrealistic? Yes. Intriuging? You betcha.


Note: I only own my original characters (who are actually my real life friends...oh well). Otherwise, I own nothing of World Wrestling Entertainment, World Championship Wrestling, Extreme Championship Wrestling, etc.  
  
WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE  
  
Chapter One: Initiation  
  
Original Characters: Mad Max (me), Bubba Binx, Shwubby  
  
When me (Mad Max) and my friends Bubba Binx and Shwubby arrived at the Alliant Energy Center in Madison, Wisconsin, we had no idea that when the night was through, our lives would be very different...  
  
Let me explain: it was my birthday, and the WWE happened to be coming through town. So we got tickets and were ringside. We all loved wrestling, and this was our first live show. To put it simply, we were freaking out.  
  
But we had done one better. We had gotten the promoters to allow us into the ring and have certain wrestlers come out and wish me a happy birthday. Corny, I know, but hell, if we're in a ring, we don't complain.  
  
So here we were, standing in the ring, with the likes of The Hurricane, Shelton Benjamin, etc., when all of a sudden, we hear Evolution's music. This is definitely a pleasant surprise...yeah right.  
  
So here we are, all the wrestlers in the ring previously left the ring, leaving me, Bubba Binx, and Shwubby in the ring with Randy Orton and Batista.  
  
Orton grabbed a mic and got right in my face. "Listen, kids, why don't you go back to your seats and...eat some popcorn or something. Evolution has something important to say." Behind him, that monster Batista nodded.  
  
I was speechless. I didn't know what to do in this kind of situation. I felt a microphone put in my hands, and I pulled it up into my face. Before I knew it, I was speaking.  
  
"Listen, Orton. You may think you're hot stuff since you need your 'pals' to help you win EVERY SINGLE MATCH (Orton got red with anger, while Batista looked on with a weird look on his face), but if you think that me and my friends will leave this ring for you and Oily over there (Batista is really pissed off now), well then smack yourself in the head with your IC belt, which you don't deserve, I might add, and think again!"  
  
I threw the mic down and the crowd roared with delight. I was shaking. I had just told the Intercontinental Champion off! But I didn't have any time to revel in the glory, because Orton jumped me and clotheslined me, while Bubba and Shuwbby went for Batista.  
  
Orton was pummeling the shit out of me, and saying things like, "Oh, you're gonna regret that, Junior. NO ONE messes with Evolution!" Then he picked me up. I was still a little dazed but I felt Orton grab my head I thought quickly.  
  
Before Orton could RKO me, I kicked him right the balls. Low blow! He doubled over, and I took the advantage to DDT him right onto his belt.  
  
Meanwhile, Bubba and Shwubby were doing quite well against Batista. They had evidently done the same thing I had done, as Batista was doubled up on the ground.  
  
Shwubby had a chair, and took it over to Batista. He was going to hit him! Oh yeah! Evolution was getting a taste of their own medicine!  
  
Shwubby, however, did not see Ric Flair running towards the ring. I yelled out to him, but it was too late, as Flair snuck up and low blowed Shwubby! Bubba ran over to help Shwubby, but by that time Batista was up, and he was caught with a spinebuster.  
  
Flair had the chair, Batista was up, and Orton was showing signs of life. And I was all alone. I wracked my brain for strategies, but my mind was blank. All I could do was stand and wait for the attack...  
  
But then I heard "Hold on! Hold on!!" I looked to see Eric Bischoff and Johnny Nitro standing at the entrance ramp. "Stop right there! This is very interesting. Three 14-year-olds vs. Evolution...this isn't a match for some house show! What do you think?" Bischoff handed the mic to Nitro.  
  
"Well, Mr. Bischoff..." Nitro said, pouring on that ass-kisser tone he does so well. "I think that we should have this match at the next RAW. Picture this: Ric Flair, Randy Orton, and Batista, Evolution, vs. those three kids! If the kids win, they get contracts. But if they lose..." Nitro looked at Bischoff, who seemed impressed, "...then Evolution can do whatever they like with them! What do you think, Mr. Bischoff?"  
  
Bischoff took the mic, obviously interested. "Well, well...that sounds like a hell of a match. Alright! That's what it is! Evolution vs...uh, what's your names again?"  
  
I was handed a mic, and I managed to say, "Mad Max, Bubba Binx, and Shwubby."  
  
"Yeah!" Bischoff said. "That's it! Mad Max, Shwubby, and Bubba Binx vs. Evolution! Six-Man Tag Team Match! If the kids win, they win contracts, but if Evolution wins, then they can do whatever they want to the losers! And this will be on the next RAW!" Bischoff dropped the mic and walked away, with Johnny Nitro close behind.  
  
I was stunned. Me and my friends in a Six-Man Tag match for contracts? We were fourteen, and being given the chance to compete in the big leagues. But once again, by minute of glory was ended when Orton finally hit the RKO he had been waiting to hit. As my consciousness faded, I heard the crowd booing and Evolution's music.  
  
Chapter 1.5: The Big Match  
  
RAW had arrived. Over 50,000 people had crammed into the Bradley Center in Milwaukee to watch us take on Evolution. We had been training for the whole week, and we thought we were ready. The key word there being "thought."  
  
The first few matches were exciting enough. I couldn't watch them. I was way too nervous. I think Bubba and Shuwbby felt the same, as both of them didn't look at the TV in the locker room, either.  
  
Finally, match time came. We all put on our wrestling outfits. We all had denim shorts on, and T-shirts. My shirt said "Black Sabbath," Shwubby's said "Chicks Dig It Big," while Bubba's said, "5/4 People Have Trouble With Fractions." Neither of us wanted to wear wrestling tights, because we weren't in super shape, so T-shirts and denim shorts suited us quite well (no pun intended).  
  
We were due out first. We waited for our music to play. I was shaking, but I knew that we would win. We had to win.  
  
All of a sudden, "Rawkfist" by Thousand Foot Krutch played. We assumed that was our music, so we walked out and were met with a huge amount of cheering. I thought my ears would explode. We stood on the ramp and, for fun, made the heavy metal sign. Then, red pyro went off behind us, and we all jumped. Then we ran down to the ring and climbed in the ring.  
  
Evolution's music hit, and Randy Orton, Ric Flair, and Batista walked out. They too, entered the ring, and looked prepared. I was no longer nervous. It was go time.  
  
Bubba and Flair were in the ring first. They tied up, then Bubba smacked the back of Flair's neck. Flair followed with some knife-edge chops, then a kick. Flair locked in a headlock, and Bubba countered into a belly-to-back suplex. He went for the cover. 1, 2... Flair kicked out. Bubba grabbed Flair and pulled him to the corner. Shuwbby tagged in, and DDT'd Flair. He locked in a reverse chinlock, then picked Flair up and DDT'd him again. 1, 2...Orton broke the cover. I jumped in and speared him. Batista tried to get in, but the ref (and me) wouldn't let him. No one saw Flair low blow Shwubby.Flair tagged in Batista, who started kicking Shwubby mercilessly. Then he choked him, then back suplexed him. He wasn't done yet. He picked Shwubby up and delivered a Spinebuster. Batista went for the cover, but Bubba was quick to break the cover. Out of anger Batista attacked him, clotheslining him. This gave Shwubby the time to roll over and tag me in. I jumped in and dropkicked Batista. Orton ran in, and I big booted him. Shwubby grabbed Flair and hit a Twist of Fate. The crowd went wild. I looked at Shwubby, who nodded. It was time to head to the promised land. I climbed the top rope, steadied myself, and was about to jump off when TRIPLE H pushed me off the top rope! What the hell?!  
  
I landed on my feet, but I also happened to land right into an RKO. I was in a lot of pain. I felt Batista roll me over and cover me. I thought it was over, until Bubba jumped off the top rope and landed a leg drop onto Batista. We were still in the match! I staggered to my feet, and saw Orton coming at me for another RKO. This time I saw it coming, and grabbed him. Before I knew it, he was on my shoulders. I couldn't believe my luck. He was in perfect position for...  
  
PSYCHO BOMB (F5 or F-Five, whichever you prefer)! Orton was down. Sadly, he was not the legal man. Batista was, and he had just Powerbombed Shwubby. Flair had Bubba in the Figure Four, and he was screaming, "Tap! Tap!" I wasn't gonna stand for this. I ran over and Super Kicked Flair in the head, knocking him out. Batista came over to attack me, but Bubba, weak as he was, managed a Drop Toe Hold. Batista hit the mat. I ran over to the turnbuckle, climbed, and, not wanting to risk HHH knocking me off again, leapt off. Moonsault! Cover! 1, 2, 3! We won! We won!  
  
Shuwbby and Bubba helped me up, and the ref raised our hands in victory. We had done it. We had accomplished our dreams. We were now official WWE Superstars.  
  
But the glory did not last long, as Triple H entered the ring, clotheslining us all. He smashed Bubba's injured legs with a chair, then smashed Shwubby in the head. He walked over to me, set up the chair, then picked me up. I felt my arms hooked, and before I knew it, I was Pedigreed on the chair.  
  
When I awoke, I was in the locker room, with a bandage on my head and surrounded by numerous other Superstars. On my chest was a note. It said:  
  
"I AM THE GAME, AND I AM THAT DAMN GOOD!"  
  
I crushed the note in my hands. Evolution would pay. We would make them pay...  
  
Well, I hoped you like it so far. Please R and R! I need feedback if I'm gonna finish this! Let me know what you think. Thanks. 


End file.
